Whats in my Wallet Part 1

You can get a good read on a person by what’s in their wallet

So seeing as I already let you all in my life, I met as well reveal some more

Part 1 brought to you by: Common Pub, where you pay $2 for a margarita and $5 to leave

The past year…or four I have really struggled with what I want to do for a living. I literally have no one set thing I want to do. Actually oddly enough I secretly wanted to be a lumberjack for a while. Anyways, I have always felt pressure to do something really important in my life; to leave a legacy. This stems from my father. He was an actual legacy, an actual somebody. People always asked him for help with everything and everywhere I went someone would tell me how great he is. He was a lawyer and a judge and seemed to effect everyone’s life in a positive way. I mean the guy’s wake had such a long line that people had to come back the next morning in order to pay their respects. People waited outside in the cold of January for literally three hours just to see my dad. Every time I went to his hospital to visit him, which was every day, there was someone already in there.Words cannot do his aura justice. I’ve never seen anything like that before. My dad was sort of a like a local celebrity, but he garnered such respect and admiration because he was a gentle soul and the first to help anyone anyway he could.He was a legend, my role model, my best friend and everything I strive to be.

So how do I live up to that? and what does this have to do with my wallet?

(words you’ll never hear me say in person alert:) My college career is basically over. I have been talking to my mom for a while about what I want to do in life. Most of the time I end up getting frustrated and tell her that I have no idea what I want to do. I always feel like my father’s friends and my family friends expect me to do something like what my Dad did. They expect me to be just like him, which is pretty much impossible. They want me to be a lawyer and a judge and do good like him, change people’s lives like him, effect the world for the better like him. To be honest though, I don’t have many job leads and the ones I do have are nothing prestigious. “How can I go back home and tell people that I’ll be working some bootleg job and I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life. I’m supposed to be the second coming of Christ, by the way.” At least that’s how I feel. This pressure may seem stupid to you, or you may think that I am the conductor of the complain train right now, but until you walk in my shoes you won’t know how much pressure I feel. There is a pressure of me to do greatness and leave a legacy like my father’s, and that is downright scary.

This Easter my mom gave me a picture.

This picture was strange when I first got it. It was a picture of my Dad’s work shoes. My Dad was little, only 5’7 on a good day and he had tiny, yet disgusting feet. I’m 6’0 and have 12.5 size feet. So my mom sat me down and asked me, “Do you think you could fit in your father’s shoes?” Logically I told her no. Of course I couldn’t. My Mom went on to tell me, ” Your father’s first job out of school was at a construction company. He was a public planning major in college. He had several odd jobs before he found his career. You literally can’t walk in his shoes but, you can look at the picture and remind yourself that those shoes took a long, unexpected journey before they found success.”

Lesson: I can’t be my Dad. But I can learn from who he was to become my own man, a good man. And do not get down on yourself if you don’t find your career and success right away. The best man you knew couldn’t even do that.

For my college friends who are going through the same things, take that lesson to heart. Everything will be OK and it is unfair of us to expect success right away.

Embrace the journey, for it is coming whether you know it or not. Make it a good one so that one day, maybe someone will have a picture of your shoes in their wallet. (see below)

Live with Love

Yours                                                                                                                                                                                     PHA